Just prior to this 18 Days, I experienced a deep, deep shift. I was physically nauseous for days and had a lot of stuff come out of my physically.  When I was first diagnosed with cancer, I had a lot of parasites. I know you are going to say, gross, but actually a lot of people have parasites and don’t even know it. In retrospect I think I was resonating at such a low frequency that the parasites needed to come in to help clean up the mess, especially where my liver is concerned.  I have always had an underlying frequency of anger (which I can clearly see now after my work with Mas). My mother has it too which she probably got from her mother. Even in the womb I am sure I was exposed to my mother’s anger that she didn’t want me. Anyway, I got very sick just prior to this 18 Days and very angry for several days.

I have had pain in my back where my liver is as far back as I can remember. When I was born, I was not breathing. I was blue and the doctors had to fight to resuscitate me for 15 minutes. I was taken from my mother immediately and placed in an ICU after they saved my life. Anyway, I say all of this to say that my liver has never worked right from the get-go and I have always had problems…

But after this “release” or whatever you want to call it, I actually now experience a tiny bit less back/nerve/liver pain. I would like to think that the patterns that are holding me back are slowly but surely dissolving and that maybe, just maybe, my liver is working a little better.  What to me is so interesting is that I have done all kinds of liver flushes since I was diagnosed, you name it, I have done it. All good for me, but they apparently don’t do much if my liver is contracted because I am holding anger. It truly is all about the frequencies. All the years of liver flushes and nothing ever lessened the pain until this 18 Days. So profound. I asked Mas about my liver when I had a private session with him several weeks ago and he said he could see that my liver doesn’t work right. He told me to just keep going and that as I grow stronger, my organs will begin to function better. So that is what I am going to do.

I actually had something very strange happen to me too, this past week. While I was angry, I was actually super, super calm at the same time. I could see that I was angry, acknowledged it and the anger was there but it didn’t affect me at all. I was super, duper calm and centered but angry at the same time. Strange, right? This lasted for like 2 days and the anger has subsided.  Mas says that whatever emotion was used to control you, you should use it to propel yourself to a new situation and I think that is exactly what is happening to me. I am using anger to find and transition myself into a new job. The difference now is that I am not letting the anger go inside of me, or suppressing it, but letting it just be, acknowledging it and letting it propel me to action, and hopefully a better life. I also got really quiet and asked myself why I am afraid of anger, and the thought came to me that at some point in my family’s history, something must have happened where I became physically afraid of my mother, of her screaming at me and withdrawing her love (which of course happened all the time when I was young). I decided to picture a sparkly light around me, like my biofield, and saw there was a hole in it, where the anger can come through and pierce my heart. So I did my best to visualize that hole mending and me protecting my space. I still have a ways to go, but I really don’t want any more to be ruled by anger. Do you think you could ask Mas to do a Mas on Sunday on anger? His MoS programs are so good and there might be others who would benefit as well.

I have one other thing that I would like to share. So, I am going through a transition. I have been offered a great job!!!-great pay and I get to work from home, which is what I want. I accepted the job, but there has been a little delay with the contract that the company has with an outside vendor, which I would be supporting. The company is 99.999% sure they won the contract, but there still is a .0001% chance that perhaps something goes astray, however they won’t really know until January. After much deliberation and soul searching, I decided to go ahead and accept the position. I will start with my new company in 2 weeks. If something crazy ends up happening in January (which I don’t think it will), I will just look for a new job. The reason I am sharing this with you is that for the first time in my life, I really am not thinking about money. I feel supported and like I am okay no matter what happens.

I realized that I always sought money because for me it was a very, very deep sense of safety and security. I realized that if I keep listening to Mas, I can try and cultivate this sense of security on my own and then the money will come. I realized that I have the ability to draw good things toward me, I have to just keep nurturing this. I suspect there will not be any problems with the contract and that everything will turn out just fine, and so I am moving forward with the job because that is what I want. I about flipped out (in a good way) when on the accelerated Mas talked about choices and if you take the old path, you only get more of the same but if you take the new path your life could be different. I felt like he was 100% directing his comments to me. 

I am going to be brave and take this new wonderful job opportunity that has been presented to me. I do not make changes quickly-I am a planner and risk adverse, but I am stepping out of my comfort zone and moving forward! So, very uncharacteristic of me. I tendered my resignation to my present employers this morning. I went back and listened to MoS on anxiety, took a deep breath and told my boss I was leaving. After 24 years with the same organization, this was not an easy thing to do, but I have such profound peace. Even if I end up having to find another job in 3 months, I am strangely okay with that. That is so radically different from the kind of person I used to be. Very, very different, but in a good, calm way. 

Xoxoxoxox - Violet

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